Get your mind out of the gutter this is a dating post.Yes people a dating post. Roll your eyes all you want. I went ahead and asked some of my Zambian male friends what really ticks them off on a 1st date. What would make them not ask you out on a 2nd date. I’m not here to judge the men’s intentions when they ask you out, only they know that. Most guys don’t talk about their feelings and will probably act like perfect gentlemen and not say a word about your behavior. I however, have no issues calling you out on your bullshit.
So I’ve summarized the 5 most common things they all cannot stand.
1. Talking on the phone for long periods of time. We get it, you want to use up all your Zamtel free minutes before they expire, but it’s not a free pass to behave like you’ve just discovered the telephone. Alexander graham bell invented it in 1876; it’s not going anywhere anytime soon. He’s trying to get to know you. This is not the time to test how long your battery lasts during a call! Be polite switch it off or put it on silent.
2. Constantly IM chatting or updating social media. This is not the time to upload instagram pictures of your fancy dinner or cocktails. Focus. I love my phone as much as the next person but really, you would be the 1st one to complain if your date did the same thing. Save instagram for when you’re out with your friends.
3. Totally ignoring him to talk to the friend you just bumped into. Updating your girlfriend on your latest catch can wait you could call her later and tell her everything that happened, seeing as you have all those free minutes. Dont even think about asking her to join you.
4. Ordering food off the menu that you’ve never eaten and failing to eat it. In Zambian culture food fights and generally wasting food in any way is no-no. Trying to look like you are “cultured” when you aren’t definitely isn’t a good look. It makes you look over eager to impress. Quit lying to yourself.
5. Bringing your girlfriend(s) along on the date.Yes she’s your girl, you want value her opinion and want to know what she thinks of the new guy. Bringing her along like she’s your conjoined twin and holding hands with her all throughout your date. I can guess what you’re probably thinking stranger danger. It’s a well-known fact that women make the best stalkers.Use that social media you love so much and check him out. If he isn’t on social media you could check his employment records, medical records, pension contributions, anything really; hypothetically speaking of course 😉 use your friends in high and low places.
As funny as listening to some of these stories was, I can’t help but feel ashamed at the lack of manners some women displayed. I understand that we probably get advice from each other. You keep listening to bad advice, you’ll end up with no seconds.